I thought that the depression would lift after I took the last pill that was supposed to cure whatever it is I had/have. Silly me. It hasn’t. It been two weeks now and all I feel is that the numbing has been lifted and I can now really feel everything. It’s like a cloud has been lifted, but the darkness it still there. As black as can be.
I find myself where I was ten years ago. I cant believe that I’m back to the point I was as a teenager, fresh in high school. At least then I was naive enough to think that the future would be different. I even think that at some point I swore never to return to that dark place again.Now that I have, I can’t really string an explanation for it. I need help.
I’m at this place where all that I going on inside me is fear, jealousy(mostly), self pity, hopelessness and emptiness. Maybe all this time I have been covering up a serious problem and it has come back to haunt me.
…or maybe it is just sugar withdrawals. I have been off of sugar for approximately the same amount of time and this is my body’s way of telling me that something is not right. Who knows?
